Over a year...

since I last wrote on this, hard to believe. I really just had to have a place to start "musing" again. The last few weeks have been so frustrating in Facebook land. I LOVE my sisters and brothers in Christ...most days. I struggle with a few who are so hateful and unforgiving in their attitude and remarks about our current president. It's hard...

It's also hard when an archbishop or two speaks out against our President speaking at the Notre Dame Commencement ceremonies. What happened to the basic respect we had for the Office...and not just the office, but for a human being? Interesting that these leaders of the Catholic church are so violently opposed to the President because he is "against life" (their words, not mine), and yet Bush/Cheney visited South Bend several times. Their were no "high minded" protests then...and these two men led so many of our young Americans into an unjust and unbudgeted war...killing many of our young men and women. Where was the outcry about life then? (By the way, I think Obama should decline and not attend at all, but I think he's a bigger person than I!)

Why is it that as religious zealots, Christians and Catholics, can only think of the un-born in regards to issues of "life"? Where is same passion for issues of "life" around the sick, the elderly, the abused children of the church? I just can't figure this one out. And I'm sure many conservative, evangelical Christians believe that by even asking the questions, I am likely not "truly a Christian". I like it that I can get this out here, I don't dare respond anymore on FB. I did once, and it got really WICKED: so no more. That's the rule about myself and FB. I really do want to be a woman of peace, and I am a Daughter of God 1st, and that is my identity. So, I am praying to not respond and to not make these issues that will divide and not unify. Jesus help me be like you! I need your help.

Also, just to really let it hang out...I don't believe GB was even really ever our President...but none of us who believe that tried to overthrow the gov't...hmmm...

Lastly, BO...you rock! Welcome to the White House. Protect and love on the 1st Family...they need you for laughter and comfort. Actually they need that from the Heavenly Father 1st, and then you can follow up with the licks and fun!

Jesus Come to my rescue:

Yesterday was just hard...nothing big or heinous happened, but I was extremely disappointed in someone I dearly love. My heart got a bit broken, as I saw some of my dreams slip away. (Sounds quite dramatic, doesn't it?...it wasn't!)...It was so good though to remember that JESUS is the source of my life. I love this song by NEWSONG, and the words totally comforted/challenged me, and renewed my eagerness to be with Jesus. If you are needing that too, I think these words are for you!

You are the Source of light

I can't be left behind

No one else will do

I will take hold of You

I need You, Jesus Come to my rescue

Where else could I go?

There’s no other name by which I am saved

Capture me with grace

I will follow You

My heart is Yours for life

I need Your hand in mine

No one else will do Lord,

I put my trust in You

I need You Jesus Come to my rescue

Where else could I go?

There’s no other name by which I am saved

Oh capture me with grace

I will follow You

This world has nothing for me

This world has nothing for me

This world has nothing for me (I will follow You)

This world has nothing for me

I need You Jesus

Come to my rescue

Where else could I go?

There’s no other name by which I am saved

Capture me with grace

I will follow You

Oh I need You Jesus

To come to my rescue

Where else could I go?

There’s no other name by which I am saved

Capture me with grace

Won't You Capture me with grace

I will follow You

I will follow You

This world has nothing for me

This world has nothing for me

Mallard Malady

Today I went in to work, as tomorrow I will be out with my parents doing the "healthcare system" visit...yikes does that get old. God love 'em, they keep hanging in there, for which I am thankful!

Ok, so back to working on a Sunday, when there's not a whole lot of staff in the building. I pull up and notice two geese/mallards/ducks (I can never get the species correct) staring at themselves in the glass doors. In fact, every now and then they would peck at the door as if trying to get their reflection to interact with them. They were clearly befuddled at the lack of responsiveness, and yet saw movement...hmmm...

I was kind of bummed for them, and yet it made a point to me. How many times do I think I'm really connecting with someone, only to find out it was a dim reflection of what I had assumed? It seemed like a connection, but it wasn't really! SUCH a disappointment (likely for them as much as for me!)...and such a desire to experience another's true and real self and yet reality "pecks it out" for us and reveals what is really truth.

So, my feathered friends taught me a little lesson today...now if they would only poop over in the grass and not on the sidewalks...now that would be progress!

Oh heart of mine:

Oh heart of mine, why must you stray?

From one so fair you run away

And one more time you have to pay

The heaviness of needless shame

Oh heart of mine, come back home

You've been too long out on your own

And He's been there all along

Watching for you down the road

So come home running

His arms are open wide

His name is JesusHe understands

He is the answerYou are looking for

So come home running

Just as you are

Oh child of God so dearly loved

And ransomed by the Savior's blood

And called by name, daughter and son

Wrapped in the robe of righteousness

So come home running

His arms are open wide

His name is JesusHe understands

He is the answer

You are looking for

So come home running

Just as you are

Chris Tomlin wrote this song, and it has been running (no pun intended!) through my mind all this week. Let's see: it was a week of Valentine's Day celebrations, lots of joy between friends who have, or who will be, attending the Great Banquet...just lots of things that made me think about love. Also, the fact that I'm wrestling over that very emotion right now.

Loving someone is such a challenge...amen? Especially when you aren't free to express that love or are scared (dare I say frightened and anxious? :-) that it won't be returned in-kind. The heart is a fickle thing, and you can't help who you fall in love with, of this I'm convinced. However, (big HOWEVER with a big, big breath!) you can help how you handle that feeling.

I've had to STOP trying to "figure it out"; to deny it; squelch it; embrace it...or whatever else one tries to do to get some relief! (yep, loving someone can be a struggle and more!)...what I've started to do (and it took way to long!) is to just keep laying this at the feet of Jesus. Asking him to protect my heart and to let him do what he does best: ACT. That means letting him acting in his time and in his way, and believing him for the best through out the process. Yikes, the TRUST thing is so hard, but boy has it helped me so much, since I finally decided to do it HIS way, versus mine...

SO, heart of mine, keep running to Jesus: not only does he understand, but HE is the answer I'm looking for me...and for that, I GIVE THANKS!

A Heart that needs to learn how to marathon, but so wants to sprint!

Sher

The body of Christ:

-starts washing dishes for a week-end retreat, when the dishwasher breaks down
-prays for struggling souls who are being pounded on by the enemy
-gets up at the crack of dawn to serve breakfast to people they have never met, but who are
on the same spiritual journey
-gets blankets for those who are cold
-cries with those who cry
-laughs when lightness is needed
-cleans toilets and showers
-runs out for needed supplies at the last minute
-brings home-baked goodies to show that "extra touch of love"
-lights a thousand candles to enhance a time of worship'

....the list could go on an on. The one thing I know is that I see the body of Christ at work when these week-end retreats occur. Oh what a difference we would make in the lives of each other and the lives of those who are skeptical about Jesus if we would love like this all the time. I guarantee that the "church" would not be seen as irrelevant or as a scary political movement. It would be seen as the place where people can be real, can experience mercy, grace, and love, and where true love through service is demonstrated, and the path up is really the path down (ie the way we grow closer to the almighty is when we acknowledge and act in our weakness...

God help us to take divine moments like these and let you turn them into something more...to be the community and family you meant for us to be...to your glory!

The faithfulness of God

My all time favorite hymn is "Great is thy faithfulness". Lately, I 've been listening to Sarah Groves and I love this song about faithfulness too!

Great is thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me

Morning by morning I wake up to find

The power and comfort of God’s hand in mine

Season by season I watch Him, amazed

In awe of the mystery of His perfect ways

All I’m in need of, His hand will provide

He’s always been faithful to me

I can’t remember a trial or a pain

He did not recycle to bring me gain

I can’t remember one single regret

In serving God only, and trusting His hand

All I’m in need of, His hand will provide

He’s always been faithful to me

This is my anthem, this is my song

The theme of the stories I’ve heard for so long

God has been faithful, He will be again

His loving compassion, it knows no end

All I’m in need of, His hand will provide

He’s always been faithful,

He’s always been faithful

He’s always been faithful to me

This has definitely been an anthem for me this past week. We got some very difficult news regarding my father (in fact, if you want to pray at 8:00 a.m. tomorrow, he will be having a biopsy). I love my dad. He's the best dad a girl could every want. He is a human (yep, flawed and imperfect) picture of what I think my Heavenly Father is like. Oh, how I wish every child could have this picture...I think the world would be a different place.

Anyway, it's hard...you know? However, in the midst of how hard this is I do not for one minute doubt God's faithfulness. He has been, is even in this, and will be faithful. Faithful to what? Faithful to comfort, to protect, to heal, to provide, to come along side, to love and to hear our prayers. THAT'S FAITHFULNESS!

How I feel:

This is one of my most very favorite songs...I love the melody, but more than that I love the lyrics: they so capture how I feel...

Wonderful, Merciful Saviour (Selah)

Wonderful mericiful Savior

Precious redeemer and friend

Who would have thought that a lamb could

Rescue the souls of men,

Oh You rescue the souls of men

Counselor, comforter, keeper

Spirit we long to embrace

You offer hope when our hearts have

Hopelessly lost the way,

Oh we hopelessly lost the way

You are the One that we praise

You are the One we adore

You give the healing and grace

our Hearts always hunger for,

Oh our hearts always hunger for

Almighty infinite father

Faithfully loving Your own

Here in our weakness You find us

Falling before Your throne,

Oh we're falling before Your throne

You are the One that we praise

You are the One we adore

You give the healing and grace

our Hearts always hunger for,

Oh our hearts always hunger for

I am hungry for God, and guess what? The Almighty, infinite father will give me healing, grace and will rescue and redeem me. How could I not want to fall before His throne and adore Him?